Ditch your mobile phone to build real life

Look at the photo below. DOES this look familiar to you?

Obsessed with phones

The photo above shows that we’re so obsessed with our phones that we can’t even go to the bathroom without them / can’t even have a proper meal with your loves one. We’re not just talking about checking your phone every five minutes or playing Candy Crush on the toilet — we’re talking about actually interact and taking to one another over a simple meal only.

This isn’t just a trend in Singapore it’s happening all over the world, and it’s not just affecting adults. Kids are spending more time with their phones than ever before, and they’re developing social skills that are less than ideal. We’ve seen a lot of articles about this problem already, but here’s our take on the negative effects of hoarding to your phones and how you can ditch your phone in order to build real relationships in real life.

Less Human

If you’re like most people, you probably spend a lot of time on your phone. And if you don’t, you might be wondering why the hell not. The truth is that smartphones are amazing. They’re powerful computers that fit in our pockets and can do almost anything we want them to do. They make us more productive and allow us to stay in touch with friends and family from anywhere around the world. But there’s a dark side to all this convenience: It’s making us less human.

Avoiding Awkward silence

When we stop talking in person and start texting instead, then it becomes easier to avoid difficult conversations or uncomfortable silences. We can scroll through Instagram rather than talk face-to-face with someone who might make us feel vulnerable or shy. And when we get caught up in our phones while hanging out with friends or family members, even if they’re right next to us, it’s easy for our attention to drift away from them toward some other place — like a fantasy world made up of pixels on a screen — where everything is always interesting and exciting because it doesn’t have any real consequences for us personally.

You are your phone. Your phone is you.

Sometimes we become so attached to our phone that it can feel like a part of us. We check it constantly, even when we know it’s not necessary. It’s a habit that has become so ingrained in our lives that we don’t even realize how much time we’re spending on it. Our phones have become more than just a way to communicate with others. They are our cameras, our calendars and even our wallets. We rely on them for so much that sometimes it feels like there’s no way to get away from them.

Your friends or families in your phone not in front of you

Every time when I am outside with friends or families, my vision is everywhere except where it should be — on the street in front of me, the sky above me, the scenery around me etc. My eyes are constantly scanning for emails and text messages and missed calls. I want to know where my friends are at all times. And since they want to know that about me too, we’re all losing contact with one another in real-world space.

Unhealthy Addiction

We all know that a lot of people are addicted to their phones. And it’s not just the younger generation, it’s grown adults too. I’m one of them. I can’t go more than 10 minutes without checking my phone for new messages or notifications. It’s bad and I know it. But I’ve been trying to break this habit, and it’s been surprisingly difficult. It’s like trying to quit smoking or lose weight: You know it’s bad for you and that you should do something about it, but somehow you keep sabotaging yourself and going back to your old ways. The first step is admitting that there’s a problem, so let me be clear: I am addicted to my phone. And if you’re reading this column on your phone right now? You probably are too.

What if..

But what if you could ditch your mobile phone for one day? What if you could leave your home without having to take your phone with you? Would you be able to function without it? What would happen to your relationships, your interactions with other people, and your sense of yourself?

It would be a little scary right? You’d have to fight off boredom. Your phone is so much a part of your identity, you might feel like without it, you don’t even exist. It’s possible that without it, you’d be more productive or even more social with your friends and family. But whether or not you’re able to survive a day without your smartphone, there are still benefits to be gained from thinking about how easy it is to become reliant on our phones.

A day without phone

Okay, so that’s a tall order. And it’s not like I’ve done it recently—my phone is usually glued to my hand. But I’ve done it before, and it was pretty awesome.

I recently decided to take my own advice and leave my mobile phone at home while I went out without mobile phones with family. Here’s what happened:

On my way to way to Supermarket one day for grocery shopping, I left my phone at home. I just went out with my wallet and myself. I didn’t bring any watch too.

I felt so loss, some part of me is missing

I had no way to keep track of the time, so when my bus pulled up at my stop, I just got on and let it take me to my destination without knowing the time. When I got off, I wandered around trying to retrace my steps—and that’s when I noticed the first thing: I don’t have any idea of any sense of time.

I also felt so loss. I have no idea what happening in the world right now. Is there anyone email me? Is there any interesting social media news now? What happen to my tweets in Twitters? I want to take a photo, but I have no camera. I felt so loss, some part of me is missing. I am nervous too.

Something suddenly happens

However, something happened suddenly. I have suddenly discovered that the sky is so beautiful (of course the photo below was taken another day when I am still stuck with my phone after this ditch phone exercise). I observed the cars around me, people around me, shops around me. And of course, many people are still looking at their phone even when walking.

I have also saw a family with child but with all of them engage in their own world with their mobile phone. It looks so sad. We have lost our human touch.

Lessons learnt

After that day, I have learnt that life is beautiful with or without phone. Consciously or subconsciously, we are always into our phones.

When I am supposed to be out physically and mentally with my kids to play or even just to accompany them at home without doing anything, I keep on looking at my phone until my kid tell me “Can you put aside your phone?” Our time with them is limited. While they still want to play with me, I must ditch my phone.

I must also learn to be present physically to friends, families, even just admire the scenery around me whenever I can. Enjoy real physical life instead of the virtual world.

Go watch

For those who still remembered this movie or didn’t watch this movie before, do go watch this movie. Hopefully one day we won’t end up like the humans in this movie where they are glued to devices from the day, they are borne.

Go experience a day or even just few moments without phone

Imagine a day or even just a few moments without phone without your mobile phone. That little device that you check every few minutes, and from which you can’t separate yourself for more than a few minutes at a time.

What would you do with the time?

You could try taking a walk, since you don’t have the map function on your phone, so you’d have to remember how to get somewhere all by yourself. You’re less likely to find your way back home – but maybe it’s an interesting adventure! You could try writing a letter to someone. It would be pretty hard to take pictures, though! So no selfies.

So awesome, in fact, that I’m willing to take an hour out of my time to convince you that you should do the same. I’m talking about the Day of the Phone Detox—which isn’t an official event, but one that many people have been doing around the world for years now.

Of course, it’s not like we’re saying everyone should ditch their phones right now. It’s just an experiment, after all. But if we all tried it at once and had the same experience…, could we learn something?

The idea:

One day, just once a year, you go all-out and leave your phone at home. You aren’t allowed to take any calls, nor can you send or receive any texts or emails or otherwise communicate electronically with anyone while out of your house. If someone wants to contact you—whether it’s a friend, a family member, a colleague at work—they have to call or text you on another number (or come by in person). It’s an alternate reality where your life is unplugged from the Internet and directly connected with other people. Then you can observe what happen to you.

Let’s work together and remind one another

I know this is difficult, but it is a good step to take. I am still learning and trying hard to move away from my phones during important physical interaction with others and with the real world outside.

Let’s work hard together and remind one another, ok? Get back the human touch and let the world be a better place. Ditch your phone whenever you can and live a real life.

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